mirror mirror
November 21, 2009
by you reading this one of us is breaking this
Patient: Thank you for fitting me in today, really. I hate to use the word “emergency” because of course this infers, well to be crude, me slicing my wrists, or downing a bottle of pills. Which don’t get me wrong if we don’t figure this all out, I may do someday. But not now of course. No, my emergency Doctor, is more complex.
Dr: I understand, of course, of course it is no bother. Please continue.
Patient: It just seems it’s never ending. You know? This cycle. It’s always the same and it’s become…tiresome.
Dr: Can you be more specific?
Patient: I am the “lay-over”.
Dr: Excuse me?
Patient: The “lay-over” is what I have coined myself. I have no problem finding a mate you see…that’s the easy part! And the rush is usually the best part… it’s all “shiny and new”…I am all “shiny and new”…but without fail…my “shine”, it wears off, and just as I become convinced that I may actually want to trust and be trusted, perhaps partake, DARE I say…in a relationship…I become…the “lay-over”. My shine has no “staying power”, it’s short lived. As it wears, I watch as others gather their “luggage” and carry on to their next destination. Which you see doctor, by my definition is well, the dreaded “something serious”. I am the “lay-over” in others journey to happiness. So I ask you again Dr…why am I not good enough to be the final destination, and no longer simply just the “lay-over”? There must be a diagnosis for what ails me Dr! Pick up that big book…start flipping and tell me what it is…Put me in a box damn it!…I demand you give me some piece of mind!
Dr: {sighing loudly} I must be honest, you have become a bore. Every week you are here, sometimes twice. The people and the places you describe may change, but the story remains the same. Your diagnosis is simple. You are suffering from: DAD or ” Die Alone Disorder”.
Patient: {gulp…choking back tears} well I think we are done here…
{as she walks slowly away from the bathroom mirror…she reminds herself: “I simply must get myself a new mirror”}
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*Rosie Frompser is on a mission to prove to the world that cooking can be delicious. Whether you’re preparing for a dinner party to be held in true eco-style, or you’re hosting a few of your guy friends over for a laidback night of Lifetime Television watching, “Chef” Rosie has the ideas you’ll need to make it successful. When she’s not cooking, or writing about cooking, Rosie dons her high-heeled boots and heads out on the town. But, after a few dirty martinis and several promising visits to the men’s room, she usually ends up going home alone to finish off that plate of brownies she started that morning at breakfast and has since been munching on all day.
maybe i should’ve gotten it from the title, but i didn’t…therefore, i LOVED the “twist” at the end in this piece. admittedly, i’m suffering from a sleep disorder known as 24-hours-just-isn’t-enough, and therefore i’m a little groggy. but i still think this is a damn good twist…! and very naughty, in a respectable way.
I agree with LEE LEE, but only because I enjoy: “naughty in a respectable way”.
You’re a pretty crafty gal, Rosie. Nice piece!
Crafty, how you’re making me think. Shiver me timbers.
thinking is such a sin
I was out of town when this came out and out of time since. Just catching up. Well done, breaking ethics codes… and mirrors.